Applying traditional wedding etiquette for parents of the bride can help to ensure that the wedding process runs smoothly up to the day of the ceremony. By understanding the roles and responsibilities, applying a few basic manners and embracing elements of general kindness, etiquette for parents of the bride can help the wonderful yet stressful day go smoothly. Although there are a number of expectations in wedding etiquette for parents of the bride, they are time-tested ways aimed at carrying out a successful wedding.
Wedding Expenses
- Traditionally the bride's parents pay for the reception costs -- including the wedding cake, food, space rental and music -- as well as the wedding invitation packages and floral arrangements for ceremony and reception. The bride's parents also pay for the gift to the couple, which can be financial or material, the wedding dress, the bridal consultant or wedding planner, and the photographer and videographer. It is the bride's parents who are to initiate topics related to wedding finances. It is not proper etiquette for the bride and groom to inquire about the parents' intention to help with expenses.
Guest List Development
- Once the finances for the wedding have been decided upon and an itemized budget set, the development of the guest list can begin. It is important to specify the number of guests to be invited to attend the wedding. This is another area that requires sensitivity and some level of negotiation, because of family dynamics and limitations set by the budget. Working with the bride, the parents of the bride help decide whom to include on the guest list, beginning with immediate family members, aunts, and uncles on both the bride and groom's side. Then, friends of both sets of parents, acquaintances, and co-workers are added, with the last group being optional.
Proper Attire Selection
- Upon selection of the wedding colors by the bride, the tradition is for mother of the bride to choose her dress first, followed by the groom's mom. The colors should coordinate with the rest of the bridal party, but not be the same color or style, including avoiding white or similar colors. The dress selected by both mothers should be the same length and of complementary styles to one another. The father of the bride selects formal wear that coordinates with the other men in the wedding party. It is the father of the bride who informs the father of the groom whether or not a fitting is needed for the formal wear.
Ceremony and Reception Activity
- For the ceremony, the mother of the bride is escorted down the aisle and is traditionally the last person to be seated for the ceremony begins. The bride's mother is the first to be escorted out of the ceremony. At the reception, she is the often the first person in the receiving line. The father of the bride guides the bride down the aisle during the ceremony the sits beside his wife. At the reception, the bride's father serves as the host of the reception and makes his round, greeting guests. Making the toast to the new couple is also an honor given to the bride's father. In addition, the father of the bride is the last to leave the reception, making sure all loose ends are tied.
