What Is Wedding Band Etiquette?

The exchanging of the wedding bands is one of the most significant parts of the ceremony. Special etiquette should be observed to ensure that the rings are safe; couples should also practice appropriate wedding band etiquette after the wedding.

Keeping the Bands

Traditionally, the groom is responsible for keeping both the bride and groom wedding bands in his jacket pocket, until it is time to exchange the rings. The best man can also hold the rings, and give them to the groom at the appropriate time in the ceremony. Rings can be held in a velvet jewelry pouch, or can be kept loosely in the groom's pocket; the suit jacket pocket should be checked for any rips or breaks in the seaming to ensure that the rings will not fall out.

Groom's Wedding Band

It is common knowledge that the groom is traditionally responsible for paying for his bride's wedding band and engagement ring. However, the bride is also responsible, according to etiquette, to purchase her groom's wedding band. The groom's band can be part of a wedding ring set, in which case the couple will divide the cost accordingly.

Heirloom Rings

The groom can present his bride with an heirloom engagement ring or wedding band, but must clear this decision with his family first. Arrangements must also be made for the wedding to be returned if the couple decide to divorce or call off the wedding. If the bride wants to wear a wedding band that is an heirloom from her side of the family, this is permitted as well. However, the bride must inform the groom of her intention to wear the antique ring, so that he will not spend money on an additional wedding band. The heirloom ring(s) can be worn with their original stones and settings, or can be taken to a jeweler so that a new stone can be placed in the original setting, or so that the original diamond can be set into a new ring.

Wedding Band Style

Traditionally, the woman's engagement ring was the ring that contained a stone or group of stones, usually diamonds. The wedding band did not contain stones, and was a plain ring made of gold, silver, or platinum. However, modern etiquette permits wedding bands that contain precious stones as well; many bands come with the engagement ring as a set. The groom's wedding bands may also be accented with diamonds. Couples can also choose to include other stones in their rings, such as rubies or emeralds, according to the bride or groom's birthstone, the month of the wedding date, or personal preference.

Wearing Wedding Bands

Both brides and grooms should wear their wedding bands on the fourth finger of their left hand. This is normally the same side of the body where the watch is worn. Brides who have both an engagement ring and wedding band should remove the engagement ring, put the wedding band on, and place the engagement ring on top; this puts the wedding band closest to the heart.

Read More

Wedding Band & Engagement Ring Etiquette

If you've recently become engaged and will be planning your wedding soon, it's important to know how to wear your most cherished pieces of jewelry--your engagement ring and wedding band. Wearing the rings on the right fingers and in the right fashion will serve to inform the public of your engaged and marital status.

Wearing an Engagement Ring

The etiquette associated with wearing engagement rings does not dictate that the ring has to be worn, or that it has to be worn at all times. However, most couples, especially those in Western society, feel as though the engagement is not "official" until a ring has been purchased, and the woman is wearing it regularly. Once the ring is purchased, it should be worn on the fourth finger of the left hand.

Selecting the Engagement Ring

According to etiquette, it is the groom's responsibility to choose the style of the ring for his bride-to-be. However, many brides are now involved in the ring selection process, to ensure that the bride will enjoy the ring and want to wear it every day. If the groom's family wants to give a family heirloom to their son to present to his bride, this is acceptable; however, the bride-to-be does not have to accept the ring, and can choose to wear a ring that she and the groom have selected. It is also appropriate for the bride to accept the heirloom ring and change the setting to fit her preference.

Cost of Rings

It is generally believed that the groom is supposed to spend at least two month's salary on the ring. This idea, however, stemmed from a marketing campaign from DeBeers during World War II in order to get grooms to make timeless purchases for their wives. However, the groom should consider his income and buy the most attractive ring for his bride based on what he can afford.
The wedding band is often less expensive than the engagement ring, but it is also common for grooms to buy the wedding band and engagement ring as a set. The engagement ring is usually the ring with the diamond in a setting, and the wedding band, which can also be adorned with diamond accents, is presented to the bride during the ring exchange portion of the ceremony. The bride is responsible for purchasing the wedding band for her husband, and gives it to him during the ring exchange. In Western society, men generally do not wear engagement rings, but the bride is free to purchase an engagement ring for her husband, or to request that he wear the wedding band as an engagement ring until the ceremony.

Wedding and Engagement Rings

After a woman is married, it is proper etiquette for her to wear the engagement ring on top of her wedding band. During the ceremony, it is appropriate to switch the engagement ring to the right hand. Once the groom has placed the wedding band on the bride's hand, she can place the engagement ring on the same finger. While most women continue to wear both their wedding bands and engagement rings after the wedding, it is only recommended that the wedding band be worn when in public to clearly denote the woman's marital status. The man should wear his wedding band in the same fashion.

Returning Engagement Rings

If an engagement is broken for any reason, it is proper etiquette for the bride to return to the ring to her former fiance. The only exception to this is if the ring is an heirloom from the bride's family. It is also appropriate for the formerly engaged woman to return any valuable gifts to her former fiance--he should return any gifts that the would-be bride has given him during the relationship that are of value as well.

Read More